"I was ashamed of myself, I wanted to be someone else”


These days everyone has depression and anxiety. Even those who look like the happiest and most positive have their low days. One in five Australians experience symptoms of a mental health disorder, and I am one of many who has struggled with both depression and anxiety within the last year.

Everyone has different triggers, for me it was battling self-esteem, and emotional and mental abuse from those around me. Since a young age I have experienced emotions of never feeling good enough for reasons I am unsure of. While genetics can predispose you to a lot of things, stress and the environment around you play a massive role in shaping your identity and self-image. I have had negative people in my life who have put me down, told me I was pathetic, called me names, pushed me to my limits and ultimately broke me in more ways than one. I lost myself and drifted from my friends and family as I felt everyone was against me. I was ashamed of who I was and wanted to be someone else, someone who was "better" than I was because in my eyes I was never good enough. Constantly on edge, crying for no reason uncontrollably, and having heart palpitations. I experienced these symptoms daily; as I feared what I would be called next and how much further I would be pushed and punished by people. I experienced social phobia, I wanted to escape everyone and be inside my own little bubble. It wasn't healthy and I felt incapable of making it go away. I got to a stage where I couldn't do it on my own.

Anxiety is something that you can't just make go away, but you can learn to control it. I was lucky enough to have a supportive family and the resources to seek professional help and prescription medication. I have gained my strength back and I can honestly say I have become stronger than ever before. Don't let fear get in the way of helping yourself or being you, as things do get better. Learn to be fearless no matter what, regardless of the negative voice in the back of your mind. Imagine the worst thing that can happen and then think about how realistic that is to actually happen to you. Your mind is powerful and can do silly things to you sometimes. Even if things feel like they're at their worst just remember that there's always a rainbow after the darkest storms.

#Anxiety #Image #Depression #MentalHealth #VoiceofHealth

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